5 Tips To Help Find Yourself as a Teenager

In school we are taught various subjects like math, history, science and all that good stuff. Yet, they don’t teach you how to find yourself. Then out of no where…BOOM! They slam you with really tough questions that you’re expected to know all the answers to.
“So what do you want to do when you’re older?”
“What major are you going to choose?”
“Where do you see yourself in 10 years?”
“Where do you want to live one day?”
Were asked these questions that many of us don’t really know the answers to. Then after we understand that we don’t know we just say that we’re, “figuring it out still.” Then we just go on with our busy lives and continue on in a direction we think we like and see where it takes us.
I believe we should be doing more than just that. Don’t worry I’m not saying to do anything super crazy, it’s actually really simple. 

We should actively be trying to find  ourselves. The person you are today is completely different than who you were when you were at seven, or thirteen. Just like how you are going to be a different person in five years than who you are now. We are always changing so I think we need to constantly learn who we are.

1. TRY NEW THINGS
I know it sounds very cliche but it’s true. Go and search for new experiences. This will make you not completely step out of your comfort zone but push your comfort zone instead. Trying new things can be scary but after you’ve done it once you can see if you like it and if so it will be easier to do it again. Broaden your horizon.

2. DON’T BE AFRAID OF YOUR LIKES CHANGING
Just because you we’re totally into that mint sea blue bed spread doesn’t mean you have to love it forever. Your style and things you like will change constantly and that’s okay! Switch it up all you want!

3. SPEND TIME ALONE
This is very important. Everyone needs personal space. Just like how you hang out with your best friend and you know them. You need to hang out with yourself so you can know yourself. Being alone is great, no one to entertain and you can do whatever you want free of all judgement.

4. BREAK YOUR PATTERNS
It’s the little things. Order a different drink at Starbucks than your normal go to. Rearrange your room. Go a different way on your jog. Doing the same things over and over can get boring. So for your happiness and sanity, try doing something a little different every day!

5. WORK ON ALL ASPECTS OF YOUR LIFE
Make sure you’re growing mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.
Mentally: Read a book. Watch a documentary. Go to a museum. Just learn new things!
Physically: Go on a hike. Go to the gym. Do yoga. Go swimming. Get moving!
Spiritually: Go to church. Learn about religions. Meditate. Something for the soul!
Emotionally: Do what makes you happy. Minimize the stress in your life. Keep the right company around.  Healthy happy relationships.

 

Que Lifestyle Change

So it’s 7:30 in the morning and I haven’t slept a lot because I woke up at two and again around four. Cassy left around five and I haven’t slept since. Anyways, I was just up pondering things like I usually do when I can’t sleep and I was thinking about something that has been on my mind a lot recently, my mental health. I’ve been talking about bettering myself for so long but I have never done anything to work on my mental health. Naturally, I would like to change that.

YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS FOLKS!….ANOTHER LIFESTYLE CHANGE FOR SHANELLE!

I honestly feel like a lifestyle change isn’t final until you’ve rearranged. Plus, just the red in my room is driving me crazy! So I’m gunna switch it up and maybe go more boho. As soon as I’m done with this post I’m gunna start by moving things around again and try to make room for a little meditation area in my room. You don’t have to start all crazy and go full Buda but y’all know that I tend to do things to the extreme so we will see. I am gunna start with a few minutes a day and work my way up. Having time to be alone will be good for me. Also I want it to be a place where I can read because I think reading is great for the mind.  It makes you learn and think things you never would have thought of or takes you places!

Also I’ve really been wanting to start working out and taking yoga classes. Shae is my little roll dog and she’s down for whatever so I know she will go with me. That way we can attempt to do that shit together! I just need some yoga outfits and room decor and oh no! I’m actually gunna stop there before I spend my check before I get it!

His Better Plan

I have some news. I finally got a job and it’s a much better job than the one I didn’t get. I applied at David’s Bridal, called to follow up and two interviews later I was offered the stylist position. Which has to be the work of God because I didn’t even know that was an option! Like my dream job is to be a personal stylist! And I just got offered to be a stylist without even knowing that was a job there. God works in mysterious ways but wow! This is such a blessing! Since I am just starting out I will start with special occasions and work my way to bridesmaids and the goal is to sell $170 an hour and then by doing so I could make my way up to brides. The job is seasonal, from December to April but if they like me they could keep me on. I hope they will because I would like to have this job long term. I have to do extremely well. Not doing well is not an option. I need to be the best. I’m glad this job is goal oriented because I do well in situations where you can work towards something more. I was blessed with this opportunity for a reason, I plan on not wasting it.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. -Jeremiah 29:11

Bend and Break

So Cassy and I are now on a break but don’t be mistaken we’re fine and on good terms.We both have different reasons as to why we are doing this. Cassy is finishing up her first semester in college and she’s extremely stressed out right now. I’ve been telling her that she needs to focus more on school because she’s very smart but the problem is that she just does an even better job at procrastinating. Literally this girl will do an assignment the morning before it’s due. With her finals coming up soon she feels a lot more pressure and stress than usual. She was explaining to me that she didn’t want to take a break but just that she wanted more space so she can apply herself more since finals are coming up. At this point I said that I think a break could be good for us. Cassy was very surprised I said this. I began explaining how I haven’t been very happy recently in all aspects of my life and so I had been putting my all into the relationship and I still wasn’t happy. I had been bending over backwards trying to make her happy hoping that it would make me happy but at the end of the day I still felt like unhappy. I told her that I feel like I need this break to focus on myself and see if I’m happier not being in a relationship. Also, someone from my past has popped back into my life and has been making me really revaluate my life and making me think what I really want. So I’ve been struggling with that and everything else on top of it. Cassy and I agreed that after her finals are over we would talk and see if she was happier without me and vise versa. Yet the strange thing is that our relationship is fine necessarily, the problem is with us as separate individuals. We cleared up all of the guide lines of our break then went on enjoying our day together in slo. It was filled with laughs and affection. Once we got to my house where she was dropping me off I start to cry a little just because I knew I was going to miss her so much. We agreed to at least say good morning and goodnight to each other but it’s hard not talking to her. What can I say she’s my best friend. I’m terrified of losing her because I don’t want to lose the friendship. After you’ve been so close with a person being without them feels strange. It’s like you have to teach yourself how to live without them. I’m just trying to put my life into perspective and see what I should do and what is best for me.